Straight paths through crooked roads

The Holy Spirit and Grace and Grace and Grace

There once was this couple who were struggling with each other so much that neither one could see any way out of their misery but to get a divorce.  They argued so often and so harshly that even their children, who were teenagers, told them that they should divorce.  They had a dilemma though, they were both Christian.  Because the Bible said that the only grounds for divorce was unfaithfulness, and since neither of them were, and since they both wanted to be true to their relationship with Christ, neither one was willing to actually begin divorce proceedings.

Finally, the husband thought, this is silly.  If we just cannot get along, there is no use going down this road any further.  So, he decided to go downtown the next day to the county court building and get the divorce paper work.  That evening, as his wife lay sleeping on the couch and he was watching TV, he looked over at her and watched her sleep.  He felt a warm love in his heart.  But he also felt the fresh pain of an earlier argument when her words and harsh voice seem to feel like claws ripping his heart.  He knew he had also said things that he knew would set her anger aflame.  He knew that they both were just defending their own feelings and justifying their own priorities in each other's face.  But he did not know any way out of this unending struggle except to end the struggle.

The next day, the husband found himself in line at the divorce papers desk in the county building.  When he got to the front of the line he found himself asking the clerk, "If I divorce my wife, can I somehow make sure that she still get's the medical coverage from my company's plan?"  The clerk looked up in surprise as if to say, "Why ask such a question?  Aren't you divorcing her?" What the clerk actually said was, "I suppose so."  When he left with the papers, he found himself asking himself the same question that the clerk seemed to ask with his facial expression.  "Why did I ask such a question if I intend to divorce her?  I must still love her enough to take care of her."  The husband eventually threw the divorce papers away.

Some time later, the husband and wife were saying goodbye.  He was going on a sales trip from their home in Fresno, California, to San Bernardino.  The wife looked up from the dining table with a sad face.  She expressed a love and yet a concern about their future together.  He said his goodbye and got into his station wagon loaded with the textbooks he sold.

All along the way down route 99 to Bakersfield the husband was again fighting himself with mixed emotions of love and anger toward his wife.  He was sometimes hoping that she would divorce him.  He was sometimes thinking that he had to divorce her.  He made the turn off of route 99 to go east on route 58.  He was driving past a small town called Weedpatch.  Then a sudden impression struck him.  This was not his conscience.  He knew how that felt in his senses.  This was the Holy Spirit speaking to his spirit.

The Holy Spirit simply said, "If you divorce her, you divorce me."  Wow!  The husband took the next exit off of the freeway.  He found a public phone at a convenience store and called his wife. 

She answered and in a firm voice simply said, "What is it?"  The husband replied, "I'm not leaving no matter what."  She said, "How are we ever going to make it?"  He said, "Grace and grace and grace." That ended the phone call.

They finally found a moment in time where the husband stood up for his wife in such a manner that she never again questioned his love for her.  That matter is so private that it remains a secret today.  However, it is no secret that today they are both in love with each other more than ever in their married life of just about 40 years.

Amy's story: redemption from crystal meth

Can a person have realistic hope of being saved from addiction to crystal meth?  Yes, this is a true story about redemption from what is known as "ice".  Amy is today in a different place.  She is now rebuilding her life.  And, she is not the only one affected.  Amy is pregnant.  She is also saving the life of her unborn child. 

Amy decided to leave home several years ago to go to San Francisco.  She aspired to become a make up artist and found a job with a prestigeous spa in the downtown area.  However, due to some unfortunate decisions, she moved from job to job and from apartment to apartment.  Each move seemed to be going downward to some degree.  She was struggling to find her way.  Amy found crystal meth to make her actually feel "normal".  It seemed at first to enable her to cope with her everyday circumstances.  She knew that it would somehow eventually destroy her.  Nevertheless, she continued to take it.

I'm her dad.  Amy was not confiding to me exactly what was going on.  I got some information in an unusual way.  At about 3 AM in early June 2008, I was awakened by a sudden and very strong impression.  It was the Holy Spirit communicating to me a definite message:  "Amy is in deep trouble."

Stefanie, my wife and Amy's mom and I had heard a TBN ministry from Jentzen Franklin about the spiritual power of prayer and fasting.  So, I simply decided to give up a simple thing that would cause no harm to health.  I gave up drinking my precious coffee for 21 days and devoted extra time to prayer for Amy.  I did not tell Amy about this.

In a few days Amy decided to visit home saying that she needed to get away from San Francisco to do some thinking.  We welcomed her visit.  She seemed to be going back and forth about a decision to return home.  She had created a life there where she enjoyed the community of her friends.  She still had aspirations to become part of show business as a makeup artist. 

The greater weight upon Amy's mind, however, was the suprise she gave us when she told us that she was pregnant.  Amy wanted to save her unborn baby's life by getting off of meth but was not sure how to do it.  She had other issues as well.  She needed a safe haven to recover. 

Stefanie had strong concerns about Amy's return home.  I did too.  But, neither one of us could deny Amy's crisis.  We could not deny her the haven of our home because to do that would have been a death sentence to both Amy and her unborn child.

So, in early August, my friend Tom and I went to San Francisco and helped Amy move.  I later told Amy that I wish I could have had a picture of our truck taking her back home.  It was so precious to me.

Now, Amy has been off of crystal meth since her return home.  She has turned her life over to Christ.  She is actively helping our church by working with children in the nursery during Sunday services.  Amy has been welcomed by the people in the church.  She tells me that she feels comfortable and encouraged there. 

No, Amy is not about to be married to the father of her child.  However, he is supportive of her pregnancy and has decided to contribute financially to her and to the new child. 

Amy has also changed her career goal.  She will be attending Fresno City College and eventually go to Cal. State University, Fresno to their business school for a bachelor's degree.

Amy also tells me that she still feels tempted by her old life and yet she remains determined to continue in her change toward new thinking and wholesome living.  One thing for sure.  She has more than supportive parents.  She has the unfailing help of the Holy Spirit.  It is the life of Christ in her and in Steffie and in myself that has been the key to Amy's redemption from crystal meth.

Have you ever wanted to give a message to the students of your old alma mater?

    

     Asbury College is in Wilmore, Kentucky.  It is a beautiful spot.  This is bluegrass country with rolling hills, white fences, Arabian horses, and a Methodist college which still maintains the original message of John Wesley.  That is my alma mater.

     Asbury College is notable for its beautiful colonial architecture, for its high academic standards, and for its Wesleyan doctrine of “holiness unto the Lord”.  Asbury was the site of a spontaneous spiritual revival in the 1970’s, a genuine miracle.

     While it is interesting to tell personal stories, it is more fulfilling to see genuine examples of what God is doing.  In my case, Asbury is an institution of the faithfulness of Jesus Christ. 

     I had come to faith in Jesus Christ as a 13 year old.  (You may wish to see the post titled “Testimony Part A).  Although I had a genuine love for God I also had the typical youthful temptations.  When I graduated from high school, I wanted to go to a Christian college to strengthen my walk with the Lord.

     When I was admitted to the college in the summer of 1958, it was not on the usual fashion.  I made a telephone call to the college because I was afraid I had missed the deadline for turning in the application.  The Dean of the whole college picked up the phone.  It was Dr. Pike.  He told me that, yes, it was late, but could I turn in the papers right away?  I agreed to do so.  Then he asked me, “Is Jesus Christ your Lord and Savior?”  “Yes,” I said.  “Then you are officially admitted to Asbury College” he concluded. 

     Halfway through my studies at Asbury I gave up my relationship to Jesus Christ.  My basic struggle was with the same youthful sins.  I would sin, ask forgiveness, sin, ask forgiveness, and so on until I became emotionally stressed to the point of hallucinations.  (I heard the bells in the administration building chiming when they were not.) 

     I remember the night when I woke up at about 2 or 3 in the morning with a shudder and a chill in my body.  It seemed that the Holy Spirit had left me.  I know there are good Christians who will disagree with that statement on theological grounds, but that is what it seemed to me.

     I began to associate with a group of non-Christian students who called themselves the “reprobates”.  I walked away from behaving like a real Christian and began to behave in ways that would take me far away from the original future the Lord had for me: a different family, a different set of careers, a different place to live, a different life altogether.

     Years later, 13 years later, I was brought back into fellowship with Christ as my Savior by a miracle of healing for my wife.  (You may wish to take a look at the post “Testimony Part B”.) 

     What struck me was how faithful Jesus Christ had been to me.  I believe He knew that I would leave Him when he first saved me as a teenager.  He pursued me until I returned to Him. And, I have determined never to make those critical mistakes again.

     In 2002, my wife and I went to my Explorer Class 40^th anniversary reunion.  Beyond the enjoyment of fellowship with old class mates, beyond the pride of showing my bride around my alma mater was something more substantial.  Jesus Christ had brought me back.  There was the victory that had truly overcome the world.  He was faithful beyond my failures.  He had created successes in my life that were built upon the mountains of my mistakes.  Coming to Asbury again was like coming home.

     If I were to have the opportunity to address the students of my alma mater, I would share the message that Jesus Christ is worth it all because He is faithful to us beyond our ability to be faithful to Him, that the holiness we need to give to the Lord is not our self righteousness, but what His holiness accomplishes in us.

Testimony Part B

     My wife had an earache.  I mean, it was the mother of all earaches.  When I came home from work my wife was waiting for me in the living room.  She sat in the easy chair, dressed to go, purse at her side.  "We have to go to the doctor right now.  I'm going across the hall to ask the neighbor in the next apartment to watch Matthew (our three year old son)."  I waited.

      She came back.  "Is Jesus Christ the Son of God?" She asked.  What? Where did that come from, I  thought.  She explained as we headed to the car.  "I was asking this neighbor (her name was Linda)  to watch Matthew when she asked me what the problem was.  When I explained that I had an ear ache she asked if she could pray for me. She asked Jesus Christ to heal me and the pain went away, completely away and it was immediate."                                                                                                         

     We got in the car to go to the doctor.  Stefanie was hitting her ear.  She wanted the pain to come back because she did not want Jesus Christ to be responsible for anything.  Stefanie is a Jewess. 

      When we arrived at the doctor's office he inspected Steffie's ear and announced that he had to vacuum out the infection in the ear.  He added that it would hurt.  My wife told him, "I can't feel a thing".  The Dr. replied, "It ought to, it's as red as a beet in there." 

     We arrived back at the apartment building, picked up Matthew, thanked Linda and went into our apartment.  Stefanie returned to the same easy chair and to her question, "Dale, tell me, is Jesus Christ the Son of God?"  My reaction was curious because part of me felt warm and excited while part of me was frightened.  I told her, "I'm not sure."

     I had been a Christian as a teenager, a radical evangelical Christian.  I had been the student president of Toledo (Ohio) Youth for Christ for high school students.  I had gone to Asbury College, a strong evangelical Christian College.  However, I had also failed as a Christian.  I had truly "fallen from grace".  Stefanie married me with the comment that she would divorce me if I ever became a radical Christian again.  So, I was hoping that somehow there was no God,  I would say that I did not know for sure that there was, but there was this warm excitement in my heart that I could not explain.

     In a few months we moved from the apartment to a new home.  Linda and her husband Olen helped us move.  They worked hour after hour for us. So, Steffie said that she wanted to invite them over to the new house to ask them more about Jesus Christ. 

     It was Saturday night when Olen and Linda arrived with their kids.  After dinner we adults sat around the family room.  Stefanie asked a religious question of Linda. I asked a religious question of Olen.  (I already knew all the answers anyway.)  I was only being either polite or hypocritical but something was happening inside my soul.  My heart was melting. 

     When I had fallen away from relationship to the Holy Spirit in college, I had received a shudder and a chill at that moment.  Ever since, I had experienced a hardness to the God i had loved before.  I even had tried to return to the Lord some years ago.  I had cried real tears but still had a hardened heart.  I did not think it would ever be possible to come back to God.  But there I was, in a real chair in front of real people, with the real Holy Spirit knocking once again on the door of my heart.

     "Well," I thought, "This bus doesn't come around every day.  I'd better get on while I can."  So, without saying anything further, I excused myself and went to the rest room down the hall.  There, in front of the mirror, I invited Jesus Christ back into my heart and soul as Savior and Lord.  It was pure joy and love restored.  What a miracle! 

     When I arrived back at the family room, it was decided that we would join Olen and Linda for church in the morning.  We woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed.  The whole family piled in the car.  I could not believe it but I was also reluctant to express my experience to Steffie because of her old threat.

     At church they were singing the hymn "Great is Thy Faithfulness".  I felt at home. But, what about Stefanie?  It just so happened that Olen sang the special song just before the sermon.  He sang "Blessed Assurance".  That song touched Stefanie so deeply that at the end of the sermon she made an immediate move forward to the altar for prayer.  Linda met her there.  Stefanie prayed and received Jesus Christ as her own personal Messiah. 

     Wow!  What a miracle!  That was in November 1973.  It has been a long journey since then.  There have been many blessings and there have been sorrows as well.  Nevertheless,  Jesus the Christ has been faithful through it all.  He was then and remains our refuge, our wisdom, our source of love and faith.   

    

Testimony Part A

Seems like there was a voice.  It was not an audible voice.  Rather, it was like a mental message but not from myself.  The voice was saying, "You need Me, you need Me."  I recognized the voice.  It was Jesus Christ speaking through the Holy Spirit to my spirit.

The reason for this incident was that at the age of 13, I became suddenly and powerfully aware of my mortality.  Life on this earth was not forever.  I had been taught by my grandmother to read the Bible, to be concerned about eternity, to pray a prayer of commitment to Jesus Christ, and that the Christian life demanded a practice of righteousness.  What is more, I knew that my grandmother had been praying for me to turn my life over to Jesus Christ.  Those were my connections to the "voice".

Living the lessons of my grandmother, was not my practice at that time.  I was a normal 13 year old interested in discovering who I was.  I was in the process of puberty.  I felt like a walking bag of gonads.  Another student on the school bus had stolen my hat and I narrowly escaped having to fight him.  In math class I sat next to the most beautiful girl in the school.  I had a paper route that enabled me to buy a new bicycle and a cornet to play in the school band.  I had food fights in the school cafeteria.  Once, I skipped classes and got spanked by the school's dean.  Normal stuff.  But the "voice" would not leave me alone.

I began by trying to reform myself.  I gave up swearing.  I gave up looking at pictures of girls in magazines.  I gave up doing anything I thought might possibly be sinful.  However, this did not satisfy the convicting feeling in my soul.  I then began to read the New Testiment.  Matthew 3:10 struck me hard.  "The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire."  (NKJV)

Again, the "voice" said, "You need Me."  I knelt down by my bedside.  It was late evening and I was alone.  I prayed the "sinner's prayer" my grandmother had taught me.  It went something like this:  "Dear Jesus Christ, I know that I am a sinner.  I ask your forgiveness.  Please cleanse my soul and come live in my heart.  I give my life to You."  I did so honestly and with faith.  The result was unexpected.

No one had told me what might happen when that prayer was finished, other than that I would now be a practicing Christian.  A warm presence now filled my spirit.  The Holy Spirit was real and had come to reside with my spirit.  The feeling of emptiness and conviction was gone.  I had feared God.  Now I loved Him.  The awe was still there but now it was in company with overwhelming devotion and enthusiasm.  It was real.  II Corinthians 5:17 says it perfectly, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!"

Not every new Christian has the same feelings.  But every new Christian gains the same new relationship with the Savior.  I felt at home.

This is only the first part of my testimony of becoming a Christian.  The second part is an entirely different thing.